Passenger Announcements
05-05-2008, 08:30 AM
#42
Line Holder
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Joined APC: Mar 2008
Position: NA-265-80
Posts: 94
I had a captain use this line:
"There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there's only 6 ways to leave this Boeing 737, so please pay attention to the important safety briefings from your flight attendants."
"There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there's only 6 ways to leave this Boeing 737, so please pay attention to the important safety briefings from your flight attendants."
05-05-2008, 08:53 AM
#43
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Feb 2007
Position: Waiting for retirements
Posts: 232
05-05-2008, 09:18 AM
#44
Line Holder
Joined APC: Jan 2008
Position: DHC-6 right seat
Posts: 72
I heard a Captain do this one as a part of his pre take off briefing.
"Ladies and Gentlemen welcome aboard XYZ Airlines. We would like to remind you that smoking is not allowed aboard this flight. Our flight time today should be 1 hour and 45 minutes. If we start to land significantly sooner than that go ahead and burn em. We have 2 and a half hours of fuel on board, so if we fly longer than that go ahead and burn em as well."
"Ladies and Gentlemen welcome aboard XYZ Airlines. We would like to remind you that smoking is not allowed aboard this flight. Our flight time today should be 1 hour and 45 minutes. If we start to land significantly sooner than that go ahead and burn em. We have 2 and a half hours of fuel on board, so if we fly longer than that go ahead and burn em as well."
05-05-2008, 09:49 AM
#45
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Oct 2005
Position: MD-11 FO
Posts: 2,225
If we have to stop short of the gate, due to not having rampers (which happpens quite a bit), I'll make this PA:
"Folks, we've stopped just short of the gate while we wait for the ground crew to get in place. Please remain seated with your seat belt fastened until the sign has been turned off. We also have an indication up here that some folks may not be wearing their seat belts, so if we could get you to go ahead and buckle those up for us, we'd appreciate it. Thanks."
The FA later tells me that she got a bunch of sheepish looks and heard lots of clicking.
"Folks, we've stopped just short of the gate while we wait for the ground crew to get in place. Please remain seated with your seat belt fastened until the sign has been turned off. We also have an indication up here that some folks may not be wearing their seat belts, so if we could get you to go ahead and buckle those up for us, we'd appreciate it. Thanks."
The FA later tells me that she got a bunch of sheepish looks and heard lots of clicking.
05-05-2008, 01:28 PM
#46
Line Holder
Joined APC: Feb 2007
Position: CRJ FO
Posts: 49
The captian I flew with on the last trip made one kinda like that. "Ladies and gentleman, we have stopped just short of the gate and are waiting on ground personal to marshal us into the gate. We ask you to stay in your seat with your seatbelt fastened until we get the plane parked and the wheels chocked. Once we are finally secure at the gate, I will turn off the seat belt sign and give you that familiar ding that will announce it is time to race for the door."
05-05-2008, 03:12 PM
#47
Tier 3 Candidate
Joined APC: Jun 2007
Position: Canadair Gosh
Posts: 609
A failed attempt at humor.
While entering a hold enroute from GSO to LGA, thinking there were some NASCAR fans on board I added to the pax announcement "and for all you NASCAR fans, we are at about 225mph, going fast, and turning left"
The captain and I thought it was the funniest thing. A call to the f/a a few minutes later revealed that no one laughed.
While entering a hold enroute from GSO to LGA, thinking there were some NASCAR fans on board I added to the pax announcement "and for all you NASCAR fans, we are at about 225mph, going fast, and turning left"
The captain and I thought it was the funniest thing. A call to the f/a a few minutes later revealed that no one laughed.
05-05-2008, 05:51 PM
#48
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Feb 2007
Position: E-170
Posts: 842
i got that the other day while dead heading along with.... by the way please dont feed the flight crew members they might accidentally bite your hand and most definately will follow you around the terminal untill you feed them again.
05-05-2008, 06:21 PM
#49
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Apr 2007
Position: propjob teacher
Posts: 224
At lunch today, my roommate was telling me a funny one that one of his capts did a couple months ago...
" For those of you on the right side of the plane we will be passing by the grand canyon." *turns the autopilot off and banks to the right*
"Ok ya'll not all at once!!"
on a EMB 145
" For those of you on the right side of the plane we will be passing by the grand canyon." *turns the autopilot off and banks to the right*
"Ok ya'll not all at once!!"
on a EMB 145
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