Grumble

I thought the Hornet was space limited with just a small area behind your right elbow to stash crap, but the Viper is SERIOUSLY cramped. I can get a weekend of clothes in the 18 compared to the lack of space in the 16.

dojetdriver

Years ago, there was a really funny letter published in either Maxim, STUFF, or FHM, can't remember which one. It was sent in by a guy that occupies one of the rear seats on an EA6B, and the virtual magic trick he witnessed one night as the guy next to him got out of his suit, did the deed in a trash bag, and got back in the suit in a minimal amount of time.

bschref

Seriously cramped, but fits like a glove! After a 14-hour flight (Kuwait to Moody) though, I can tell you: fits like a glove = hurts like hell!

FightingFalconI

Unstrapped from the ejection seat, yes he survived. The parachute is attached to the shoulder harness so he went out with just his chute attached. No poopie suits on the ONC missions. I think there was one fatality on an ocean crossing where the airplane just went out of control and they figured the guy was using his piddle pack and was out of control in to the water.

USMCFLYR

Ah - means the same then. We were strapped in with the shoulder harness too (then you had the leg restraints and the lap belts). Not because I was trying to go to the bathroom, but I accidentally flew one time without the shoulder straps fastened. Scared the crap out of me after the fact!

USMCFLYR

Grumble

Took a **** going up the driveway one night around 20:00. Standard habit pattern was to safe the seat (which does not trigger a check seat caution in the air) incase I accidentally tugged on the handle fumbling with the jaws of death while I was unstrapped. Strapped back in, hit three tankers and returned to the boat six hours later.

Imagine the look on my face when I trapped on the boat at 2am, got the "deedle deedle" in the wires and looked down and saw the "check seat" caution. Entire mission, and trap, with a safe seat. After that I still safed the seat, but I would turn off one of the DDI's (MFD if you like) as a reminder. When I was done I made sure I was strapped back in, seat armed, before the display came back on.

AZFlyer

Making #2 in a jet sounds like one of the most physically inconvenient places/times for that to happen. And you know, you're not done pooping till you pee again....

Ftrooppilot

Alright Huggy fess up. Do your pressure suits come equiped with a prophylactic-style urine collector connected to a valve which directs the urine into a pressure suit pocket bag ?

I understand that when the valve is opened it creates a suction.

We didn't even have diuapers in the "F."

nfnsquared

I know of a former Griffiss AFB B-52 copilot (at the time) who actually did a deuce in his helmet bag while airborne in a T-37 (circa 1994).

They (2 BUFF copilots) were on a multi-leg ACE (Accelerated Copilot Enrichment, IIRC) cross country. The incident pilot grabbed a burger at the local snack bar on one stop and it hit him about 30 minutes after airborne on the next leg. This guy actually put his pins in, took off the parachute and seat belt, dropped his flight suit and left a deposit in his helmet bag, all while the other copilot flew the jet.

They both had to go 100% O2 the rest of the way to the next stop because of the smell. I forget where the next stop was, but it was a civilian field where hot chicks meet the aircraft in a golf cart and a red carpet. Apparently the look on the hot chick's face as the canopy raised and the odor escaped was priceless.

The incident copilot declined a ride in the golf cart and quickly walked his helmet bag to the nearest dumpster all while his fellow copilot laughed his ass off while riding to the terminal with the hot chick.

To make matters worse, their use of 100% O2 on the rest of that leg depleted the O2 supply. The civilian field did not have an O2 supply. Because of this, they had to reroute their next leg to stay below 10,000 MSL and to a military field that had O2.

Of course, changing their flight plan route required notifying the ACE Det commander before doing so. It's too bad the DETCO didn't record that conversation.

HuggyU2

FightingFalcon: Just off the top of my head, I believe there were only 2 instances of pilots ejecting from the Viper doing this. Both survived, I thought.

Ftrooppilot: we wear a Urine Collection Device... UCD. Basically, a large heavy gauge rubber condom-like device with a small hole in the top. You clip it into a hose inside the pressure suit. This hose goes to a valve on the left thigh. On U-2/SR-71 pilots, you'll see a rubber hose coming out of the suit from the left thigh. This gets plugged into the "honey bucket" in the airplane.
When ready to urinate, inflate the suit, and open the valve: the high pressure air goes rushing out that little hole in the top of the UCD, and it carries the urine away. Works like a champ.