Normalize pooping
#21
On Reserve
Joined APC: Apr 2024
Posts: 14
![Default](https://www.airlinepilotforums.com/images/icons/icon1.gif)
What usually happens to me is I wait until I get to my hotel room. As you know, the closer you get to the toilet, the worse you have to go. And as luck would have it, as I am squeezing my butt cheeks together as I put my key in on the 25th floor of the hotel, the key card doesn't work. References Tucker Maxx at the Embassy Suites in his book "I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell".
![](https://www.airlinepilotforums.com/clear.gif)
#22
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Jan 2011
Posts: 586
![Default](https://www.airlinepilotforums.com/images/icons/icon1.gif)
Im one of those people that doesn't drop a deuce in a public spot. Just the body type that knows where it's at, etc, and bowel movemement seems to know when to activate and when to lay dormant, 99.9999999999999999% of the time.
HOWEVER, a while back in the climbout, I started getting the grundles, thinking they would subside, no such luck. Inform the cabin that before they get busy, I'm gonna have to step out.
I'm able to hang on, but I've got an epic shytezkrieg boiling that would rival Operation Barbarossa.
Make it to the lav, get down to business. As I'm almost done, I can smell the air freshner the FA's carry. Man, Im in the dumper, and I can smell that stuff. So it has to be bad, like, REALLY BAD. I give MYSELF a couple mercy flushes.
I finish, I was never so embarassed to step out of a lav.
Thank god the FA had a good sense of humor about it.
HOWEVER, a while back in the climbout, I started getting the grundles, thinking they would subside, no such luck. Inform the cabin that before they get busy, I'm gonna have to step out.
I'm able to hang on, but I've got an epic shytezkrieg boiling that would rival Operation Barbarossa.
Make it to the lav, get down to business. As I'm almost done, I can smell the air freshner the FA's carry. Man, Im in the dumper, and I can smell that stuff. So it has to be bad, like, REALLY BAD. I give MYSELF a couple mercy flushes.
I finish, I was never so embarassed to step out of a lav.
Thank god the FA had a good sense of humor about it.
#23
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Dec 2013
Posts: 2,293
![Default](https://www.airlinepilotforums.com/images/icons/icon1.gif)
I always wonder how many times those coffee packs they put in the lavs to soak up the smell accidentally (or intentionally) get used to make a pot of coffee. One reason I refuse to drink airplane coffee.
#26
![Default](https://www.airlinepilotforums.com/images/icons/icon1.gif)
Enroute back from the Caribbean one day we step out to do our obligatory lav break an hour before landing. I go into the lav and I swear I had never smelled a lav that clean and fresh EVER. I know cleaners down there and in other countries do a much better job than in the US but I was impressed. I came out of the lav and remarked to the purser that I wished all lavs smelled that good. She said that's courtesy of this. She shows me a bottle of peppermint essential oil that she ordered off Amazon. She said she places several drops on a paper towel and then puts it under the coat clip in the lav before leaving on the turn...lasts all day to prevent malodorous encounters for the crew and passengers using the lav.
#27
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Jul 2013
Posts: 4,749
![Default](https://www.airlinepilotforums.com/images/icons/icon1.gif)
What usually happens to me is I wait until I get to my hotel room. As you know, the closer you get to the toilet, the worse you have to go. And as luck would have it, as I am squeezing my butt cheeks together as I put my key in on the 25th floor of the hotel, the key card doesn't work. References Tucker Maxx at the Embassy Suites in his book "I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell".
Thanks, must have been a word evolution in the last 30+ years.
#28
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Mar 2017
Posts: 3,766
![Default](https://www.airlinepilotforums.com/images/icons/icon1.gif)
You all may want to see a doctor lol. I cant say I have ever had to go "this" bad or not able to walk past my hotel bathroom before stopping. I guess I have a rock gut or something.
All joking aside, I get that sometimes the unthinkable happens, thankfully not to me yet.
All joking aside, I get that sometimes the unthinkable happens, thankfully not to me yet.
#29
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Jul 2013
Posts: 4,749
![Default](https://www.airlinepilotforums.com/images/icons/icon1.gif)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FLNe4ZlJ9jQ
I wish I could find the animated video that was made from the program that was popular about 15-20 years ago where you could input dialogue into the cartoon characters.
But someone made one of the infamous GreatLakes Tyler Wojo incident.
I wish I could find the animated video that was made from the program that was popular about 15-20 years ago where you could input dialogue into the cartoon characters.
But someone made one of the infamous GreatLakes Tyler Wojo incident.
#30
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Jun 2010
Position: DOWNGRADE COMPLETE: Thanks Gary. Thanks SWAPA.
Posts: 6,770
![Default](https://www.airlinepilotforums.com/images/icons/icon1.gif)
Im one of those people that doesn't drop a deuce in a public spot. Just the body type that knows where it's at, etc, and bowel movemement seems to know when to activate and when to lay dormant, 99.9999999999999999% of the time.
HOWEVER, a while back in the climbout, I started getting the grundles, thinking they would subside, no such luck. Inform the cabin that before they get busy, I'm gonna have to step out.
I'm able to hang on, but I've got an epic shytezkrieg boiling that would rival Operation Barbarossa.
Make it to the lav, get down to business. As I'm almost done, I can smell the air freshner the FA's carry. Man, Im in the dumper, and I can smell that stuff. So it has to be bad, like, REALLY BAD. I give MYSELF a couple mercy flushes.
I finish, I was never so embarassed to step out of a lav.
Thank god the FA had a good sense of humor about it.
HOWEVER, a while back in the climbout, I started getting the grundles, thinking they would subside, no such luck. Inform the cabin that before they get busy, I'm gonna have to step out.
I'm able to hang on, but I've got an epic shytezkrieg boiling that would rival Operation Barbarossa.
Make it to the lav, get down to business. As I'm almost done, I can smell the air freshner the FA's carry. Man, Im in the dumper, and I can smell that stuff. So it has to be bad, like, REALLY BAD. I give MYSELF a couple mercy flushes.
I finish, I was never so embarassed to step out of a lav.
Thank god the FA had a good sense of humor about it.
Seal off the inside of the bowl from the outside world with your a$$, thighs, etc. so as to not let any odor escape and then immediately flush anytime a significant amount of “content” exits your body and drops into the bowl.
The strong suction from today’s non-blue juice bowls will prevent odor from escaping into the cabin. Don’t be stingy about flushing as many times as needed.
You’re welcome.