I hate rwy 15. That was where I had my worst landing in the 747 as well.

Would have liked to see that bounce, though!

TOTD goes to the CA who confidently claimed "I have never been called about the temperature in the back" while turning the cabin temp control up to 32C every leg. FA's called every leg he "managed" the ECS.

Go Jet Captain playing Star Wars music and giving Star Wars themed announcements. Thinks he’s also a comedian with lots of jokes that were duds. Made a PA in IMC pointing out that those on the left and right could look out their windows see what the inside of a cloud looked like.

The PA’s were long and painful. Guy sitting behind me said out loud “who told that guy he was funny?”

Truly embarrassing to the profession.

Wasn't Captain Rollerskates was it?

Was riding on GoJet once and the CA did his announcements as Glenn Quagmire. Indeed very embarrassing to the profession.

Since this seems like a good opportunity, can I just throw this out........

I've done the pax thing and made my share of announcements. Now, I spend a lot of time as a paying passenger, out of uniform, unrecognized as a crew member to my seat mates. Their feedback is always the same.

Short and sweet is the key. No one and I mean NO ONE cares about the route, the cruise altitude, your pilot background or most of what gets said. On time or late and maybe the destination weather if it's noteworthy, but even that's pushing it. Comedy routines or any other attempts to entertain rarely, if ever, are appreciated. Many times the PA system is AFU or the person talking isn't using it properly and no one can understand much of what gets said anyway.

All people want to do is get back to their music, book or in-flight movie. No offense, it's just reality.

^^^^^ This.
A mike-happy CA or FO is just as bad as a mike-happy NFL ref. Just tell me what I need to know and nothing more. The fasten seat belt light is either on or off, I don't care about the light chop or the dissertation on why I can't get my pretzels and half a can of Coke.

True for many pax, most especially super-frequent flyers and crew. But new, infrequent or nervous flyers do appreciate some re-assurance, even if it's nothing more substantial than someone who sounds like they know what they're doing. They may not care much about what you said, but some folks do care that you said it. Marketing surveys bear this out.

And I'd bet that some of the folks who tune it out would notice if it didn't happen and wonder why. They don't care about engine noise either, but they'd notice if it stopped.

No we wouldn’t.

You better..... Or we will drag you off the airplane.

On aircraft with entertainment systems, it interrupts the movie/tvshow/game. No one wants to hear it.

A brief initial greeting and brief landing announcement is all that is needed or desired based on my experience and observations over the years. Adlerdriver sums it up real nice. Definitely no place for the PA “CB” blabber routine.

So we inconvenience everyone on the plane except the 1 or 2 nervous fliers? Doesn’t seem right to me.

I make PAs extremely short unless we’re late or there is something out of the ordinary going on. If it’s early morning or late night they’re not getting any announcements.

I’d like to see these “marketing surveys” that show people actually care about announcements.

I flew a few legs with a CA who made long, painful, never ending, "funny" PAs that made me want to eat a gun. Could barely hear them but still brutal.

Was completely little taken aback at the 10-15 deplaning pax who took the time to thank him for his funny PAs.

Im in the short, sweet and to the point group.

Absolutely not. Short and sweet is plenty sufficient for the folks who appreciate a PA... I was by no means advocating long or dooshy announcements. And any mention of what you flew in the AF or lame humor is dooshy. Except SWA, they can get away with humor sometimes. Maybe.

Did a red eye out of LAX, captain makes this long ass announcement, I very nicely said, you know you just woke everyone up. He looked at me like he wanted to take the ax to my head.

Always a fan of minimum PAs myself except in the summer when flying in Alaska. Since a majority of the passengers were vacationers it was nice to point out geographic interest items like glaciers, mountain ranges, etc. On a clear day even the business travelers appreciated that.

You don't have to do 25 minutes on Mt. St. Helens (heard that once!). Just a simple "On the right a nice view of the Malaspina Glacier" suffices.

Tool of the day
 

Some guys are just in their own little bubble sitting up front. Just no SA on what’s going on in the back.

It’s one of the reasons I enjoy being a captain. No listening to guys babbling on the PA making us both look like clowns.

"Welcome aboard everyone. Two hours to _______."




That's all you need.

Anderson Cooper for TOTD

Years ago a captain passed in flight, Cooper asked if the plane was in danger of crashing. Today he asked the two guys who stopped the TX shooter, "knowing what you know now, would you do it over again?"

As a 777 FO, I always wanted to make the following PA,

"Welcome aboard, blah, blah, blah..........., now sit back, relax and enjoy our Flagship Flight Attendants cumulative 500 years of service experience."

For some reason, they never let me touch the microphone.

Exactly!

Especially on a red eye. I hate guys who ramble on about stuff at 3 am. No one cares.

Free whiskey always gets their attention.:D

BS flag thrown. Nobody gives pas at 0300 unless all hell is about to break loose and they feel compelled to for safety. I don't believe for a second that any CAs or FOs are pointing out anything in the middle of the night. Nobody is that big a tool.

Incorrect.

Plane Coffee

In a previous life I flew with a guy that did exactly this. Grand Canyon, LAS Vegas, continental divide, northern lights, you name it.

AND- at the same outfit the FA’s would leave the cabin lights on full bright the whole red-eye because “it’s too dark and we can’t see the passengers when we are doing service.”

And that airline is wondering why they aren’t making money.

100% dead serious.

Alaska Airlines

Just for clarification, I never said to do this at night. It would irritate everybody to no end when the redeye got to cruising altitude and some tool would say:

"We just reached FL330. I'm going to turn off the seat belt sign so you're free to move about the cabin. However while you're in your seats keep your seat belt fastened...yada yada yada."

Zip it. Everybody's asleep and no one cares.

Yes, at night you have to be more creative. One CA offered a free bottle of champagne to the passenger who made the closest guess at the combined weight of our F/As. Reportedly, he tripped and was run over by a crew van. :D

When investigated, there were three sets of tire tracks. Forward, back up, and forward again, just to make certain.

B.S.
Once the first run over is complete, the average FA crew in a van has already moved on to a 20 minute discussion on what their cat's are doing 3 time zones away along with analyzing the latest episode of the Kardashians.

Well, what will happen to Robert?

Must be why Delta crew are always blabbering away on their 20+ y/o junker's, nothing to interrupt.

Last night in Colorado:
"Denver center, Delta xxxx we just had a meteorite dissipate in front of us. Looks like about 20,000."
"Delta xxxx, say again?"
"We just had a meteorite dissipate in front of us at 20,000 ft"
"Uh ok"
The captain and I were laughing our asses off. Shooting star, douche bags!

Technically it was a meteoroid, unless it contacted the surface.

"Shooting star" means you spent too much time watching Disney instead of "Cosmos" as a kid.

Have you ever seen the turbulence one of those things creates?? I, for one, appreciate their PIREP. 😁

Saw that. You could see pieces coming off.

Yep. Disney and eating lead paint!

Delta moderate?

P.S. Wind check