Any "Latest & Greatest" about Delta?
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Bwahahahaha
Good stuff FTB, Timbo and others!![Big Grin](https://www.airlinepilotforums.com/images/smilies/biggrin.gif)
Any bets on the arrival of a new memo due to the "law of unintended consequences"
Good stuff FTB, Timbo and others!
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Any bets on the arrival of a new memo due to the "law of unintended consequences"
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I think I'm going to stop washing my uniform and stop wearing my tie because I don't recall that being in the CONTRACT
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On the subject of gate house PA's.
Back in 2000 at Continental Express we had a pamphlet written on how to make good PAs and it had some canned PAs we could use. The person who wrote it was a bit... well... see the big picture above. Went so far as to use their name as the example name in the pamphlet which led many pilots to make PAs using his name.
Anyways, I'm trying to find some good canned speeches we can use and I think I found one. It's from Mark Twain called Our Fellow Savages.
We'll replace some of the text to make it applicable to our gate house situations.
CAPTAIN GATE HOUSE SPEECH TEMPLATE:
"Ladies and gentlemen: The next PA in this concourse will be delivered this evening, by [use real name], a gentleman whose high character and unimpeachable integrity are only equaled by his comeliness of person and grace of manner.
And I am that man!
I was obliged to excuse the gate agent from introducing me, because he/she never compliments anybody and I knew I could do it just as well.
The [mechanical/weather/staffing issue] will be the subject of my lecture--when I get to it. And I shall endeavor to tell the truth as nearly as a pilot can. If I embellish it with a little nonsense, that makes no difference; it won't mar the truth; it is only as the barnacle ornaments the oyster by sticking to it.
Unfortunately, the [insert delay issue] is a repulsive one. It was a case of [delay issue] leprosy, of so dreadful a nature that I have never been able to get it out of my mind since I heard about it a few minutes ago. I don't intend that it shall give a disagreeable complexion to this lecture at all, but inasmuch as it is what is keeping us delayed.
It is a very hard matter to get a disagreeable object out of one's memory. I discovered that a good while ago. When I made my way down the jetway today I was shown some very interesting things, and I expected to recollect every one of them and pass them along to you-- but I didn't. I forgot every one of them--except one-- and that I remembered because it was unpleasant. It is [delayed issue].
I've never been so sick in all my life than I am now to have to tell you that, [dramatic pause, consider putting head down on gate counter] we are going to be delayed today because of it.[consider pounding fist 3 times on counter, do not lift your head]
But I am losing time; what I have been saying don't bear strictly on the [delay issue], but one reminiscence leads to another, and I am obliged to bring myself down in this way, on account of that unpleasant thing that I first saw there. It is not safe to come to any important matter in an entirely direct way. When a young gentleman is about to talk to a young lady about matrimony he don't go straight at it. He begins by talking about the weather. I have done that many a time.
My next remarks will refer to the [delay issue]. Now if an impression has gotten to you that this issue will cause us to go cartwheeling down the runway in a ball of flames, that is the error I wish to combat.
But I must run at this point. I'll be back to talk to you more about the [delay issue] in 15 minutes.
Back in 2000 at Continental Express we had a pamphlet written on how to make good PAs and it had some canned PAs we could use. The person who wrote it was a bit... well... see the big picture above. Went so far as to use their name as the example name in the pamphlet which led many pilots to make PAs using his name.
Anyways, I'm trying to find some good canned speeches we can use and I think I found one. It's from Mark Twain called Our Fellow Savages.
We'll replace some of the text to make it applicable to our gate house situations.
CAPTAIN GATE HOUSE SPEECH TEMPLATE:
"Ladies and gentlemen: The next PA in this concourse will be delivered this evening, by [use real name], a gentleman whose high character and unimpeachable integrity are only equaled by his comeliness of person and grace of manner.
And I am that man!
I was obliged to excuse the gate agent from introducing me, because he/she never compliments anybody and I knew I could do it just as well.
The [mechanical/weather/staffing issue] will be the subject of my lecture--when I get to it. And I shall endeavor to tell the truth as nearly as a pilot can. If I embellish it with a little nonsense, that makes no difference; it won't mar the truth; it is only as the barnacle ornaments the oyster by sticking to it.
Unfortunately, the [insert delay issue] is a repulsive one. It was a case of [delay issue] leprosy, of so dreadful a nature that I have never been able to get it out of my mind since I heard about it a few minutes ago. I don't intend that it shall give a disagreeable complexion to this lecture at all, but inasmuch as it is what is keeping us delayed.
It is a very hard matter to get a disagreeable object out of one's memory. I discovered that a good while ago. When I made my way down the jetway today I was shown some very interesting things, and I expected to recollect every one of them and pass them along to you-- but I didn't. I forgot every one of them--except one-- and that I remembered because it was unpleasant. It is [delayed issue].
I've never been so sick in all my life than I am now to have to tell you that, [dramatic pause, consider putting head down on gate counter] we are going to be delayed today because of it.[consider pounding fist 3 times on counter, do not lift your head]
But I am losing time; what I have been saying don't bear strictly on the [delay issue], but one reminiscence leads to another, and I am obliged to bring myself down in this way, on account of that unpleasant thing that I first saw there. It is not safe to come to any important matter in an entirely direct way. When a young gentleman is about to talk to a young lady about matrimony he don't go straight at it. He begins by talking about the weather. I have done that many a time.
My next remarks will refer to the [delay issue]. Now if an impression has gotten to you that this issue will cause us to go cartwheeling down the runway in a ball of flames, that is the error I wish to combat.
But I must run at this point. I'll be back to talk to you more about the [delay issue] in 15 minutes.
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LOUISVILLE, Ky. -- Charlie Strong says he will answer questions about his future at Louisville when the time is right.
Big East blog
ESPN.com's Andrea Adelson writes about all things Big East in the conference blog.
His comment Monday did more to fuel questions about whether he is leaving the Cardinals than it did to put them to rest.
Strong's name has surfaced for job openings at Tennessee and Auburn. When he was asked if he could definitively say he will be at Louisville next year, the third-year coach said, "I will say that at the right time."
Strong says he has not spoken with other schools and added that he has a great job at Louisville. He also says he is in a "no-win situation" regarding the reports about his future.
Louisville (10-2) will play Florida in the Jan. 2 Allstate Sugar Bowl.
Big East blog
ESPN.com's Andrea Adelson writes about all things Big East in the conference blog.
His comment Monday did more to fuel questions about whether he is leaving the Cardinals than it did to put them to rest.
Strong's name has surfaced for job openings at Tennessee and Auburn. When he was asked if he could definitively say he will be at Louisville next year, the third-year coach said, "I will say that at the right time."
Strong says he has not spoken with other schools and added that he has a great job at Louisville. He also says he is in a "no-win situation" regarding the reports about his future.
Louisville (10-2) will play Florida in the Jan. 2 Allstate Sugar Bowl.
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What an ass.....
Not trying to bring that whole debate up but
As a former NWA I wish there was a big 'ole middle-finger smiley to post.
Note to mods: before deleting my post I hope you recall tsquare's use of the same statement that resulted in no removal.
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C'mon guys. Purple Drank's the ass. Let it go.
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